Parhaat Cheryls Podcastit (2024)

In this penultimate episode of the season, we finally learn the dark secrets of the Farm, Hiram finally gets arrested, and we finally get to see Hiram and Archie in the sauna together.

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Chapter 55: Prom Night 57:21

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3M ago57:21

57:21

Archie is double-booked for boxing matches, Cheryl is banned from running for prom queen, and Betty and Jughead have a scheme to (finally) catch the gargoyle king.

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Chapter 54: Fear the Reaper 1:17:46

4M ago1:17:46

1:17:46

The Jones play G&G to save JB, Archie attempts to psychologically recover from killing a man, and we say goodbye to Josie. Oh, and Kevin is *totally* Betty’s best friend.

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Chapter 53: Jawbreaker 56:42

5M ago56:42

56:42

Archie has a boxing rematch, FP and Jughead try to stop Fizzle Rocks overdoses, and Betty chloroforms her mom.

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Chapter 52: The Raid 56:54

5M ago56:54

56:54

Jughead and the serpents try to stop his kingpin mom’s drug dealing gang. Betty and Cheryl try to stop the Farm. Veronica tries to stop her parents from getting divorced. They all fail.

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Chapter 51: Big Fun 57:22

5M ago57:22

57:22

Yes, it’s the Heathers episode! The main topics of discussion are the dramatic whooshing sound effects, a college paper about the intertextuality that Allison wrote, and the iconic outfits, dance numbers, and line changes.

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Chapter 50: American Dreams 53:37

6M ago53:37

53:37

FP is turning 50, Archie is trying to end people wanting to kill him once and for all, and Reggie wants to matter Ronni.

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Chapter 49: Fire Walk With Me 58:18

6M ago58:18

58:18

Allison and Evan attempt to comprehend incomprehensible plotlines about genius 7-year old murders (who are secretly the younger brother of your juvie siutationship), underground casinos, and “deputizing the serpents”.

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Chapter 48: Requiem for a Welterweight 1:00:12

7M ago1:00:12

1:00:12

Archie wants to box professionally, Alice wants to be baptized into the farm, Gladys wants the gargoyles to join the serpents, and Veronica wants daddy to get out of crime (as always).

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Chapter 47: Bizarrodale 1:14:10

7M ago1:14:10

1:14:10

In maybe my favorite pod so far, we discuss the “gay antics” episode “Bizarrodale”. Cheryl outs someone through blind items, Kevin can’t keep blaming Brokeback Riverdale with someone who’s in the closet, and we assess the long term impacts of conversion therapy.

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Chapter 46: The Red Dahlia 50:58

8M ago50:58

50:58

Archie is in his flop era, Veronica tries to keep the mob enterprise going while Hiram is down, and we finally get to see Penelope’s brothel.

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Chapter 45: The Stranger 57:35

9M ago57:35

57:35

Archie is back home, the kids are stressed about taking the SATs, and Betty just wants to go to college.

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Chapter 44: No Exit 1:02:08

9M ago1:02:08

1:02:08

Jughead tries to rein in the serpents, Betty tries to get the nuns to testify against Hiram, and Archie is attacked by a friggin’ bear.

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Chapter 43: Outbreak 55:22

9M ago55:22

55:22

Jughead and Archie make it to Toledo, Betty and Ethel try to break out of the Sisters of Quiet Mercy, and Veronica and Cheryl waterboard Penelope in maple syrup.

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Chapter 42: The Man in Black 50:55

9M ago50:55

50:55

Veronica goes all in on her speakeasy, Archie and Jughead are on the run from the law, and we get a look inside Betty’s twisted mind.

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Chapter 41: Manhunter 1:00:00

9M ago1:00:00

1:00:00

Archie is on the run from the law, Betty does some not-so-great detective work, and Jughead is fully spiraling.

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Chapter 40: The Great Escape 1:09:26

10M ago1:09:26

1:09:26

The gang tries to break Archie out of juvie, while Jughead spirals into madness. Side rants include the turmoil of twinks on Julian Fellowes’ shows and NXIVM.

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Chapter 39: The Midnight Club 1:03:42

11M ago1:03:42

1:03:42

We flashback to the ~late 80s/early 90s~ to see the origin of Gryphons & Gargoyles.

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Chapter 38: As Above, So Below 1:19:57

11M ago1:19:57

1:19:57

Archie is forced into a juvie fight club, Ethel (and Jughead?) attempt suicide, and Veronica’s (non-alcoholic) speakeasy opens!

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Chapter 37: Fortune and Men’s Eyes 1:03:49

12M ago1:03:49

1:03:49

In this chaotic episode, we are introduced to Evelyn Evernever, Dr. Curdle Jr., the Gargoyle king, and Monica Posh. It’s also the Epic High and Lows of High School Football episode.

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Chapter 36: Labor Day 1:13:24

12M ago1:13:24

1:13:24

Allison and Evan discuss the season 3 premiere: highlights include Kevin’s lack of self-esteem, a debate about Archie Andrews’ Catholicism, and the introduction of Griffins and Gargoyles™️ and the Farm™️.

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Bonus: Riverdale Buzzfeed Quizzes and Imagines 1:04:47

1y ago1:04:47

1:04:47

For season 2’s bonus episode, Allison and Evan play fuck, marry, kill and ship or dip with riverdale characters, read some frankly traumatizing imagines, question the internet’s thirst for Sweet Pea and discuss Charles Melton’s recent accolades.

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Chapter 35: Brave New World 57:18

1y ago57:18

57:18

The season 2 finale! Jughead fights to keep the serpents alive, Archie is a dumbass, and we see the seeds of the cult antics to come.

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Chapter 34: Judgement Night 1:08:50

1y ago1:08:50

1:08:50

All of Riverdale is in pure chaos, someone tries to murder Veronica, someone else tries to murder Archie, someone else tries to murder Betty and Jughead (almost) gets murdered.

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Chapter 33: Shadow of a Doubt 1:12:46

1y ago1:12:46

1:12:46

The Black Hood is back, Fangs goes to jail, Archie loses control over the Dark Circle and finally chooses his dad over his daddy.

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Chapter 32: Prisoners 1:04:00

1y ago1:04:00

1:04:00

In this episode, Allison and Evan discuss why the river vixens have funeral uniforms, if Archie is worth a million dollar ransom, is Sheriff Keller actually a good sheriff and who is Chic really?

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Chapter 31: A Night to Remember 55:38

1y ago55:38

55:38

It’s the Carrie musical episode! Ethel is jealous, the Black Hood is back(!) and Allison and Evan do far too much singing.

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Chapter 30: The Noose Tightens 1:01:15

1+ y ago1:01:15

1:01:15

Toni tries to break Cheryl out of conversion therapy, Archie betrays his dad for his daddy, and Alice puts her snake skin back on.

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Chapter 29: Primary Colors 1:11:35

1+ y ago1:11:35

1:11:35

JH runs an actually successful protest, Cheryl gets sent to conversion therapy, and Andy Cohen is there.

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Chapter 28: There Will Be Blood 1:10:04

1+ y ago1:10:04

1:10:04

Archie takes a blood oath to Hiram, Jughead finally figured out what the Lodges evil plan is, and we quote “We could’ve had a real good life, Archie’s Dad” 7 times.

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Chapter 27: The Hills Have Eyes 1:19:49

1+ y ago1:19:49

1:19:49

It’s the Love Simon episode!!! Cheryl and Toni go on their first date to Love Simon, Kevin goes to this gay rom-com (Love Simon) alone, and the rest of the gang has a romantic weekend at Lodge Lodge (to avoid having to watch Love Simon).

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Chapter 26: The Tell-Tale Heart 1:01:58

1+ y ago1:01:58

1:01:58

Betty hides a body, Archie shows unreasonable loyalty and Fred may or may not have been using undocumented Canadian workers this whole time?

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Chapter 25: The Wicked and the Divine 1:17:19

1+ y ago1:17:19

1:17:19

Allison and Evan discuss Veronica’s confirmation, Catholicism, Cole Sprouse’s acting, and icon Papa Poutine.

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Chapter 24: The Wrestler 1:14:22

1+ y ago1:14:22

1:14:22

In this frankly iconic episode, Allison and Evan discuss homoerotic wrestling, if Chic is hot or not, and the fact that Hiram Lodge has definitely suffered from Kinsey 2 allegations.

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Chapter 23: The Blackboard Jungle 1:08:35

1+ y ago1:08:35

1:08:35

In this episode, Allison and Evan react to Southside High shutting down, Betty finding her long lost brother, and explain why Veronica and Archie are actually soulmates.

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Chapter 22: Silent Night, Deadly Night 1:05:33

1+ y ago1:05:33

1:05:33

In this episode, Allison and Evan discuss Jughead skinning a woman, the Barchie kiss and the black hood getting caught!

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Chapter 21: House of the Devil 57:26

1+ y ago57:26

57:26

Allison and Evan discuss one of the most insane episodes of Riverdale (yes, the one where Betty strips to Mad World).

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Chapter 20: Tales from the Darkside 1:14:47

1+ y ago1:14:47

1:14:47

Allison and Evan discuss one of the best Jarchie plotlines, Cheryl’s problematic behavior, and why you should always trust your women’s intuition.

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Chapter 19: Death Proof 55:37

1+ y ago55:37

55:37

In a frankly chaotic episode, Allison and Evan discuss the sugarman, FP’s return, and the ethics of street racing.

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Chapter 18: When a Stranger Calls 1:16:56

1+ y ago1:16:56

1:16:56

Allison addresses “your mom still dresses you slay-core”. Evan raves about Alice Cooper gaslighting and slaying. And they explain why you shouldn’t go into abandoned houses even if a serial killer tells you to.

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Chapter 17: The Town That Dreaded Sundown 59:34

1+ y ago59:34

59:34

In this episode, Evan and Allison discuss an underreported problematic Archie moment, the ethics of vigilantism and how Betty’s ponytail is iconic and beyond reproach.

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Chapter 16: The Watcher in The Woods 54:26

1+ y ago54:26

54:26

Allison and Evan discuss woke Fred Andrews, the homophobic Betty Cooper moodboard, and how Kevin Keller did nothing wrong.

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Chapter 15: Nighthawks 1:02:06

1+ y ago1:02:06

1:02:06

In this instant classic of an episode Evan and Allison discuss the inherent homoeroticism of threatening to release your cousin’s snuff film and the prison industrial complex. And Allison sings 3 separate Taylor Swift songs.

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Chapter 14: A Kiss Before Dying 52:00

1+ y ago52:00

52:00

In the season 2 premiere, Allison and Evan discuss the arrival of Hiram “Daddy” Lodge, Fred’s brush with death, and Hermione not letting go of the Cristal.

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Bonus: Riverdale Meme Reaction 1:00:28

1+ y ago1:00:28

1:00:28

In this season 1 bonus episode, Allison and Evan react to circa-2017 Riverdale memes. It’s a lot of fun.

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Chapter 13: The Sweet Hereafter 1:17:25

1+ y ago1:17:25

1:17:25

On this finale, Allison and Evan discuss Serpent Slut™️ memes, Archie leading Betty on for no reason, and the future of Riverdale.

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Chapter 12: Anatomy of a Murder 1:02:42

1+ y ago1:02:42

1:02:42

Evan and Allison identify many plotholes in the penultimate episode of the season! #SpareUsTheMiddleClassMorality #WhereEvenIsToledo

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Chapter 11: To Riverdale and Back 1:16:20

2y ago1:16:20

1:16:20

Allison and Evan discuss why Riverdale is an indie darling show, if Veronica has the emotional bandwidth to deal with Archie, and if Pop’s milkshakes are in the recommended diet of pregnant women.

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