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A Star to Steer Her By

A Star to Steer Her By

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New episodes every Thursday! Podcasts: a frontier that isn't actually very final at all. These are the voyages of the podcast A Star to Steer Her By. Our continuing mission: to watch every single episode of Star Trek (even the dumb ones), to comment on and snark at whatever suits our fancy, to boldly split infinitives that no man has split before. Follow our crew of Chris, Jake, Ames, and Caitlin as we explore the universe of Trek, go on wild tangents, crack wise, and make more fart jokes th ...
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Happy Halloween, everyone! We decided to take advantage of the fact that the holiday is on a Thursday this year and sat down to watch the low-budget campfest that is "Jason X"! It looks like it cost roughly $12 and starred every Canadian actor that wasn't working on a "Stargate" or other syndicated early-2000s sci-fi series over a weekend off, whic…
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Well. We weren't sure what exactly to expect going into William Shatner's other foray into "Trek" documentary making, "The Captains", but we definitely weren't expecting THIS. Join us as The Shat turns everything into a self-serving therapy session, especially with Patrick Stewart! Gape in horror at the mind-numbing misogyny he spews in front of Ka…
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With JJ off to work on his beloved "Star Wars" and Simon Peg on writing duties, we come to the (as of writing) end of the Kelvin Timeline. They're going out on a high note, though, featuring the best of their outings and one of the better big screen "Trek" experiences overall. With a better understanding of the characters and world, and a really gr…
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So the 2009 reboot actually did pretty well, the Kelvin timeline has been established, time to really go out there and oh never mind it's a lame "Wrath of Khan" rehash. With a white Khan. And an ultra-objectified Carol Marcus. And Kirk and Spock are mad at each other for...reasons? Still a better 9/11 "Trek" than "Enterprise", tho.Also this week: s…
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Well the whole prequel thing wasn't great with "Enterprise", so Paramount went to the next "we're out of ideas" phase: REBOOT! Yes, they've dumped Berman but brought in Abrams to bring his "Star Wars" flavored touch to "Star Trek". Time gets warped, Kirk gets drifted, and everyone gets significantly younger in 2009's "Star Trek"! Also this week: Ke…
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Somehow we've made it: after a little over 8 years and hundreds of episodes we've covered all the "Trek" that aired on broadcast TV from 1966-2005. Before we jump to the next phases of the franchise, we thought we'd take a little time to have a more general discussion about everything that got us here. It's a broad overview where we re-cover the ca…
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"Enterprise" might be over, but she has one last outing...sort of. If its finale was HORRIBLE fanfiction, how about you step right up for some, if we do say so ourselves, much better fanfiction! Yes, your stalwarts are at it again, putting their own unique spins on the "Star Trek" universe with the crew of the NX-01. This time: contests, crossovers…
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Our collective dislike of "Enterprise" is hardly a secret, but even your hosts (and our guest) agree this show deserved a better sendoff than "These Are the Voyages...", or at least a sendoff that was about itself. Rather than simply wrapping things up with the preceding two-parter, the talentless hacks in charge decided to sideline the cast of thi…
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We're in the home stretch and "Enterprise" sure is cranking up the stupid to 11! What's the dumbest twist you could have? The two-parter "Demons" and "Terra Prime" has a good chance of using it. RoboCop himself has dropped into "Trek" to unleash a scheme that really only makes sense if you're already a deranged xenophobe who got his hands on some l…
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It's the moment one of your hosts has been waiting for and the others have been dreading! It's time for the "Enterprise" take on the Mirror Universe in the campy two-parter "In a Mirror, Darkly". Watch as we and a guest struggle to tell the difference between Prime and Mirror Archer and wonder if other people weren't allowed to be evil ENOUGH.Also …
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Oh, boy, time to get some new "Trek" lore! No, not the android kind, the backstory kind! Also I guarantee it's a kind no one sensible wanted, needed, or ended up liking! First up, it takes two terrible episodes to find out why the Klingons are so darn different in TOS with "Affliction" and "Divergence"! After that, brace yourself for what a misogyn…
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Well now the Romulans have gone and done it! In their convoluted attempt to destabilize the region they've just gone and helped lay the groundwork for the eventual United Federation of Planets! Maybe there was a better use for their super psychic powered self-repairing ships than this? Also Trip and T'Pol's relationship takes a decidedly teen drama…
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Everyone's up to something this week, tho motivation is maybe a bit vague. First up: voyeuristic aliens are being really creepy and possessing the crew just so they can watch people die in "Observer Effect". After that, someone has come up with a needlessly elaborate ship to try and start a war between the Andorians and Tellarites in "Babel One".Al…
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Step right up to the bout of the 22nd century as the final showdown between the forces of EVIL face the forces of...ah...Archer and Co in "Kir'Shara"! But don't leave just yet, as in our next round it's man vs their own past hubris in "Daedalus"!Also this week: the 90s S, Chris tries to pull a Jake, and Harry Kim![timestamps: Kir'Shara: 01:14; Daed…
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"Enterprise" woke up one day and realized they'd kinda made the Vulcans sort of a mess. So they've decided to semi retcon it so that it's just one dude in the High Command who's evil and everything else is more like we remember it. Mind melding is fine now, we promise! Also, look, it's T'Pau in a deeply unnecessary appearance! And Surak is here, bu…
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Since there's been some genetic engineering talk on "Enterprise" recently we decided to finally take a look at 1997's "Gattaca". It's the story of a near-futuristic (or alternate present?) dystopia with designer babies and a future determined entirely by one's genes. But Ethan Hawke wants to go to space, dangit, and he'll do whatever it takes, incl…
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"Enterprise" has left infurating war crimes behind and has gone back to the familiar comfort of dull and copying older "Trek". In parts two and three of a story that did NOT need to be a three-parter, the Augments go on a rampage and Soong realizes maybe he did, in fact, do a bad thing by unleashing them on the galaxy. Join us, won't you, for "Cold…
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Well look at that, July 4th has fallen on our release day this year and it's always fun to take a break from "Enterprise"! So we're finally taking a look at 1996's action-disaster-blockbuster "Independence Day" (aka ID4)! Get those nostalgia goggles off and see if it still holds up when aliens blow up practical effect monuments and only sexy sexy J…
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Season four finally starts proper after last week's bizarre opener. First up, the crew goes "Home" and does a take on TNG's "Family" if it was a slog and had really bad lessons woven into it. After that: it's part one of what will be multiple three-parters in the final season of "Enterprise" as Brent Spiner guest stars as one of his own ancestors t…
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When we last left our heroes there were aliens in WW2 because why not, right? Sure. Fine. So we're picking up that thread and it turns out to be a bunch of Temporal Cold War nonsense in "Storm Front", parts 1 and 2. On the plus side it's also the end of that idiot saga.Also this week: a questionable montage, Machine Gun Reed, and Commander Chakotay…
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Oh God quick finish it up now, now, NOW! It's "Zero Hour" on "Enterprise" as everything is just tied up in a...well, not a neat little bow. Kind of a last-minute convoluted bow? Also somehow everything and nothing happens all at the same time. Then it's topped off by maybe the dumbest cliffhanger ever?Also this week: too long a shorter season, lott…
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One day, the writers of "Enterprise" woke up and remembered they weren't writing Nationalistic Propaganda-fest "24" and actually wrote a couple episodes of "Star Trek," wherein people talk about their problems instead of constantly torturing, murdering, and stealing from innocents! Check out a VERY late course-correction as we approach the end of t…
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We're racing to the finale but we have to have some filler on the way! In "The Forgotten" John is too busy talking to the Xindi to write a letter so he makes Trip do it. After that, endure a crappy rehash of "Children of Time" with "E²".Also this week: a narratively pointless blaze, a narrative device person, and Gul Dukat![timestamps: Forgotten: 0…
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John is only just starting to notice maybe he's up to no good after murdering people in cold blood and then committing piracy. He's still not positive, though. First up, in "Azati Prime" he decides diplomacy is for jerks. Then, in "Damage" he makes a bad choice and we find out T'Pol has secretly also made one but it's only getting mentioned now, ju…
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Bust out the fisheye lens, because it's time to get nuts! First up: it's another rehash of a better episode as Phlox slowly goes mad as he runs the ship while almost everyone else naps in "Doctor's Orders". After that, goo to the face in "Hatchery" turns John into the craziest thing the show can possibly imagine: a responsible Starfleet captain!Als…
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Look, we're running out of ways to say how bad this season is. First up: Archer comes up with a new form of psychological torture in "Stratagem". Then he decides with NO EVIDENCE WHATSOEVER that some dying guy is evil and makes him literally writhe in agony (which isn't okay even if he IS evil, JOHN!) in "Harbinger". Then we talk about someone with…
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For pity's sake, John keeps falling for obvious lies this week on "Enterprise". First up: religious extremists take over the ship way too easily in an attempt to end a moronic war for jerks in "Chosen Realm". After that, Shran is back to totally just altruistically help and NOTHING ELSE in "Proving Ground".Also this week: the dumbest ladder, Sponge…
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We're taking a bit of an "Enterprise" break to discuss one of the foundations of modern cyberpunk and its legacy sequel: "Blade Runner" and "Blade Runner 2049". In a future where it almost never stops raining, artificial human slaves and their complex, ever-shifting relationship with their human creators/oppressors are the crux on which the world t…
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John wants his way and he's gonna get it, and to the devil with ethics and sensible choices! First up: Trip is in a coma and the Cap'n'll do anything, including listening to Phlox, to get his friend back in "Similitude". After that, why take a soldier into the past when you can drag your first officer along because reasons in "Carpenter Street".Als…
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We got time travel and cosplay time travel this week on "Enterprise"! First up, Archer has "Fifty First Dates" syndrome and has to be told daily that Earth done gone kablooey over a decade ago in "Twilight". After that, how did old west humans get onto an alien world in the Delphic Expanse? Find out in "North Star"!Also this week: symbolic stabbing…
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The Xindi arc continues this week, and the investigation gets stupid. First up: it's a little "Phantom of the Opera", a little "Beauty and the Beast" and maybe a big pile of tell don't show when Hoshi becomes unwilling roommates with a lonely telepath in "Exile". After that, Archer learns a lesson about the Xindi he'll almost definitely forget by n…
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When you've got a stun setting, just follow Muldoon's advice and all your problems will be solved. First up: the Xindi come up with a needlessly convoluted plan to get information on human biology in "Rajiin". After that, "Trek" decides to do a pretty humdrum zombie story in "Impulse".Also this week: rewrites, running short, and Odo![timestamps: Ra…
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"Enterprise" is going too fast! First up: Archer ditches his morals faster than you can say "enhanced interrogation" in "Anomaly". After that: maybe "Extinction" would've been more interesting if we didn't know what was happening so early on in it (probably not, tho).Also this week: moral cowardice, Chekov's peach, and Chief O'Brien![timestamps: An…
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Well, it's here. The end of Season 2 and start of Season 3, where the producers decided "let's do 9/11". First up: the dumbest aliens ever decide to try the test version of their planet-killer ray on their ultimate target, thus giving Earth ample time to plan in "The Expanse". After that, "Enterprise" starts its bold new season with yet ANOTHER pri…
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Everyone is so bad at everything they do this week! First up: we find out how Archer went from milquetoast to milquetoast but a Captain in the tension-free "First Flight"! After that: a dude that's way too nice to be a bounty hunter has the misfortune of capturing Archer and having to spend time with him in "Bounty"!Also this week: three-hander, th…
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Content warning: discussion of suicide.Archer just keeps biffing it this week. First up: he's too blinded by his new friends' toys to realize their society is absolute garbage in "Cogenitor". After that, "Enterprise" betrays the prequel format yet again by having Borg show up in "Regeneration".Also this week: confused messaging, timeline theories, …
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Even when they give him something to do, "Enterprise" wastes Mayweather. First up, it's a toothless rehash of "Fortunate Son" as Mayweather visits his family's cargo ship in "Horizon". After that: he gets to lead a rescue mission until he inevitably busts his leg in "The Breach."Also this week: a memorable opening, needs more bigotry, and Kira Nery…
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Back to the rehash mines, "Enterprise"! First up: Starfleet meets their first energy beings and we recall all the times they're going to have done it better in their future/our past in "The Crossing". After that, Martok shows up to defend Archer in "we have Star Trek VI at home", otherwise known as "Judgment".Also this week: bread, a missing key de…
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Starting off the same but going very different places in both episodes this week! First off: is a drifting ship the final resting place of Zephram Cochrane or, just perhaps, an Admiral From the Future's tomb in "Future Tense". After that, it's another false imprisonment story that ALMOST becomes "Con Air" but refuses to be that cool in "Canamar".Al…
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Warnings UP FRONT:Unfortunately, "Fusion" is important background to the first episode this week, so the events of that come up. Also we're talking Tasha Yar later so her unfortunately-written history is also discussed.ALSO: we throw caution to the wind and spoil the ever-living crap out of "Picard" throughout the blogtivity this week. Like almost …
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Things are heating up on "Enterprise"! First up, a radiation storm is going to cook everyone alive unless they cool their heels with some new alien friends in "The Catwalk". After that, we've been there and done that but now the sun's going to broil Trip alive in "Dawn"!Also this week: avoiding ambiguity, continued familiarity, and Guinan![timestam…
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Ooh, it's a chilling week on "Enterprise". First up: is a transporter issue turning Hoshi into a g-g-g-ghost in "Vanishing Point"? After that, YOU decide what's more terrifying: how lazy the very familiar plot of "Precious Cargo" is, or the absolutely abysmal acting of its principal guest star!Also this week: dreams are stupid, a season one week, a…
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The solutions this week are such lazy pulls from the writer's behind that calling them deus ex machinas would be an insult to that concept. First up: Archer and Reed are so desparate to not break the nonexistent Prime Directive that they almost get killed until the "Enterprise" crew realizes they have something for that in the trunk in "The Communi…
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Simple solutions abound this week! First up, a very lazy "Seven Samurai" clone is wrapped up with no loss of life thanks, in part, to the worst Klingons we've ever met in "Marauders". After that, T'Pol has a complicated past...no, wait, she's definitively good and her quarry explicitly bad in the lazy "The Seventh".Also this week: one last dose of …
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The past is back to haunt us this week on "Enterprise" – both recent and not. First up: while searching for a fix for the mine damage from last week, the crew is directed to an automated repair station that seems a bit too good to be true in "Dead Stop". After that, Archer has offended the Kreetassans again (but maybe they have a point this time), …
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This week Archer's inability to leave well enough alone drives one plot and is actually pretty integral to solving another. First up: Archer's done some rooting so T'Pol tells an old family tale of cultural contamination in "Carbon Creek". After that: an accident in space has Reed doing his usual "sacrifice me for the good of the ship" schtick and …
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How do you wrap up a season one like the one "Enterprise" just had? By suddenly remembering how to write a halfway-decent episode of "Star Trek"! Despite heavily featuring The Temporal Cold War and the entirely obnoxious Daniels we find ourselves pretty happy with the pacing and feeling of actual stakes! What could this mean going forward?!Also thi…
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"Enterprise" has decided to have an arc, and it's about trying to get to Risa! No, really. But there's some hiccups on the way and even more once they get there! First up: Data's Mom is an inspiration to T'Pol but uh-oh she might be bad in "Fallen Hero". After that, Mr. Krabs wants Archer's help against tyranny in "Desert Crossing". Finally, almost…
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Fresh off last week's desperate attempts, we've got another bit of stunt-casting and then a really...interesting alien design. First up, the writers were really afraid we missed their subtle metaphor when they invite Archer's old buddy Al to play an evil jailer in "Detained". After that, there was a much easier solution to "Vox Sola" but then the e…
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We have to imagine the conversation at "Enterprise" HQ was something akin to: "OH GOD MAYBE THEY'LL LIKE IT IF WE BRING BACK EVERYTHING THEY LOVE?!" So get ready for canon-bending Ferengi, Ethan Phillips, and Jeffrey Combs in "Acquisition". After that, it's Rene Auberjonois in a semi-remake of a DS9 episode in "Oasis".Also this week: the idiot ball…
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