Parhaat Holy Watermelon Podcastit (2024)

1
AUM-mageddon 47:26

12d ago47:26

47:26

Shoko Asahara (born Chizuo Matsumoto) led a modest cultus that grew rapidly beyond the borders of its native Japan. A blind acupuncturist, Asahara was convicted of selling pharmaceuticals illegally before he decided to sell people faith instead. Asahara studied many religious traditions before concocting one of his own that would appeal to the peop…

1
Cthulhu and the First Sneeze 1:00:54

23d ago1:00:54

1:00:54

Literature is full of doomsday cults, but the real world is much more chilling. This week we explore the Great Green Arkleseizure, the Cthulhu mythos, and the many gods described in the works of Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. Douglas Adams' approach to popular culture brought us a fantastic new version of pious deism. H. P. Lovecraft brought us a…

1
Root Awakening 52:20

1M ago52:20

52:20

Hoodoo is a terribly syncretic religion, developed as a sibling to Voodoo (and there are other siblings in this family, too). Magickcrafts have been traded for as long as people have been trading spices and weapons, and Hoodoo Conjurers have collected a fantastic variety of tools from their neighbors. There's a lot to learn when you're genuinely in…

1
Branded Self-Help 1:17:39

2M ago1:17:39

1:17:39

Keith Raniere is the object of worship in the NXIVM cult, a god in the plainest sense of the word. The founder of a few MLMs, this guy knew how to make a fortune from people who turned out to be easy to manipulate. From collecting voluntary celebrities and multi-millionaires to veritable human trafficking, NXIVM started out looking like a simple se…

1
Written in the Stars 47:31

2M ago47:31

47:31

New Age religion is a lot more than a scheme to sell books and crystals, it's a belief that a new age of enlightenment is dawning--or did so centuries ago--or is centuries away. It might be something to fear, or something to celebrate. Astrology is all trash, and we're happy to point out the best reasons why. But, it can also be wholesome entertain…

1
Mayan'd Your Business 46:07

3M ago46:07

46:07

Latin America has managed to preserve some of its pre-Columbian religious heritage, so we're going to explore the traditions of the Olmec, Maya, Aztec, and Inca nations. We explore cocaine, purification rituals, human sacrifice, gods from throughout history, and Catholic syncretism. All this and more.... Support us on Patreon or you can get our mer…

1
Cult Classics 51:56

3M ago51:56

51:56

It's time to take another look at religion in popular culture, in particular, cults in film, and why we love telling these stories. The Wicker Man (Either Christopher Lee's 1973 classic, or Nicolas Cage's 2006 remake) is a fantastic story about a man trying to save a girl who doesn't want to be saved from the cult of her little island town. The Rit…

1
An August Assembly - an Interview with Dr. Sean Hannan 1:10:41

4M ago1:10:41

1:10:41

Dr. Sean Hannan did his post-graduate studies at the University of Chicago before joining the faculty of MacEwan University in Edmonton Alberta. His studies revolve around St. Augustine of Hippo, and the medieval mystics like Meister Eckhart von Hochheim. Augustine of Hippo was a profoundly significant character in the development of early Christia…

1
Don't Skip the Good Ones 36:21

4M ago36:21

36:21

After ragging on people who surely don't deserve the veneration they receive from faithful Christians around the world, for their questionable morality, or even dubious historicity, it's time for us to look at a heptad of saints who are genuinely good role models--at least on the surface.... For these saints (as opposed to Teresa of Calcutta), pove…

1
The Imperial Church 53:51

5M ago53:51

53:51

The Church of Rome doesn't represent all of Christianity, but it is a major portion of the global population, so it's time for us to look at their foundation, and what makes them distinct from other groups. We explore the history of the Catholic Church, including the history of apostolic codenames, and the trouble with apostolic succession. The lon…

1
Don't Fear the Reaper 38:07

5M ago38:07

38:07

Gods of the underworld are not the same as gods of death, nor are the guides the same--not even the Grim Reaper. Hades is the minder of the subterrestrial realm, just as Zeus and Poseidon are the minders of the Mountain (... and the sky) and the Sea (tough to argue for pluralizing those realms). Pluto is the same figure, adopted by the Romans AFTER…

1
Cover Your Shame 43:15

6M ago43:15

43:15

Religious clothing is as varied as any other kind of fashion, but there are a few common themes that we will highlight: Chastity is encouraged in modesty, and it's weird that covering your hair is more important that loose-fitting tops; weirder still when covering your hair with more hair has religious pressure on the cultural misstep. Fancy hats a…

1
Stop Hitting Yourself 1:11:37

6M ago1:11:37

1:11:37

If sin were ugly, the world would be a paradise. Sin has a lot of faces in religious traditions around the world, some more consequential than others. Hamartiology is the study of sin, and it looks like some folk only want to define the line so they know how close they can stand. Sin is simply the misstep or error that divides people. Some people a…

1
Let's Build a Church 34:00

6M ago34:00

34:00

What is a church? How does a religious society really differentiate itself from any other kind of society? What does it take to become a priest of the Holy Watermelon? Some people join self-help groups without realizing they've been trapped in a cult. We'll be up front about it: this is a church. How can we be a church while also being secular and …

1
Dying to Know 1:17:05

7M ago1:17:05

1:17:05

Why are there no bear ghosts? Nearly all the ghosts in the world seem to come from a specific period of time, long before any of us were born. There is a universal obsession with death, so we're going to explore death from the perspective of those left behind. (Traditions about what lays beyond will be the subject of another episode.) We talk about…

1
Touched by the Angels 56:55

7M ago56:55

56:55

Angels in most traditions are heavenly messengers, and modern pop culture has greatly exaggerated almost every feature. While it makes sense to assume that there are female or feminine angels, each one named in Abrahamic scriptural tradition is a man. The word Angel comes from the Greek Aggelos (lit: messenger), and the Hebrew word Malak has the sa…

1
In the (Hubbard) Navy - An Interview with Katherine Spallino 1:05:54

8M ago1:05:54

1:05:54

Katherine Spallino is the author of The Bad Cadet, a memoir of her days as a child-slave to the secretive Scientologist "Sea Org." Before she joined the Sea Org officially, Katherine was raised away from her family in a boarding school for cursed and abandoned children, part of the last batch permitted by the Sea Org before they banned Sea Org memb…

1
The Alien Escape 53:18

8M ago53:18

53:18

Bonnie Lu Nettles and Marshall Herff Applewhite, Jr. founded what is known today as Heaven's Gate, a fantastic group of UFO enthusiasts and religious believers. Though they both came from a Christian background in Texas, the mystery of Area 51 affected their daily lives to the very end. Nettles was a nurse, and Applewhite was a pastor, but they sha…

1
How YOU Could Become a God 59:09

9M ago59:09

59:09

Apotheosis is the process of becoming a god, and that gift isn't always limited to the dead. Some classic examples include Asclepius, Ariadne, and Glaucus. Apotheosis also appears in the Abrahamic tradition, in a varity of manifestations, including the Alawite tradition, which elevates Ali ibn Abi Talib to godhood. We examine the diference between …

1
How They Became Gods 47:50

9M ago47:50

47:50

Euhemerism is essentially the hypothesis that many of the gods who have been celebrated throughout history may not have been simple fabrications but real people around whom great myths developed and grew to legendary proportions. Euhemerus was a fellow who entertained and educated with tales of how the old gods of Hellenic (Greek) tradition were or…

1
Sounds Suspicious 1:02:52

10M ago1:02:52

1:02:52

Ever wonder why we bother with the groundhog, or horseshoes, or four-leaf clovers? Have you noticed city employees relying on divining rods to find your water leak? Where do all these superstitions come from, and how do they manage to linger in our science-powered information age? All these questions have answers, and we've tracked them down for yo…

1
The Legend of (Persian) Zoro 41:44

10M ago41:44

41:44

Zarathustra is the mythical hero at the foundation of Mazdaism, and thus it is better known as Zoroastrianism. Because ancient sources disagree on when this camel herder lived, it's nearly impossible to prove that he ever did, though there must have been an original founder of this ancient Persian religious tradition, the man's true name is certain…

1
Priesthood to Parenthood - an Interview with Frank McMahon 55:45

11M ago55:45

55:45

Frank McMahon served in the VATICAN. Now, he's joining us to talk about his experience with Playboy, puberty, alcohol abuse, Buddhism, and the things he loved about his service with the Missionary Oblates of Mary Immaculate, as well as why he left, and the things he hopes to see change in the church. We talk about Frank's favorite and least favorit…

1
Some Santas that You Used to Know 53:01

11M ago53:01

53:01

St. Nicholas' Day has passed, but we're not done with Christmas visitors yet. Santa has taken a few different forms over the centuries, and he's got an army of companions and alternates, too. Santa Claus takes inspiration from a variety of European folk traditions, and many of these old traditions have survived with modifications in the Christian e…

1
Questionable Saints 51:20

12M ago51:20

51:20

There's no shortage of saints with questionable careers, even during their "faithful years." For others, we might be looking at people who never existed. Let's explore more saints who might not deserve such exalted status. We can say with almost rock solid certainty that Saint Vernoica never existed. She is famed for the veil that bears the imprint…

1
Pretty Fly for a Mennonite - an Interview with Andrew Penner 1:03:52

12M ago1:03:52

1:03:52

Andrew Penner grew up in the Mennonite tradition of the Anabaptist movement. The Anabaptists have a colorful history of subversion from the Catholic Church, despite their commitment to pacifism. There's an awful lot to learn on these subjects, including the connection with the Amish and Hutterite branches, as well as the variation within the Mennon…

1
Spellbound Puritans 48:42

1y ago48:42

48:42

As we close out the spooky season, it's time to talk about Puritanism and the extremism that led to witch hunts and barbaric murders of innocents. The Puritan movement was born from the Church of England, with the idea that King Henry VIII and the new English national episcopalian congregation hadn't reformed nearly enough after breaking away from …

1
This is Halloween 50:15

1y ago50:15

50:15

Halloween is--despite what you might hear from your local evangelical group--a Christian holiday... kinda. There's a lot to it, and there are layers of syncretism to dig through, but just under the secular (not-technically-pagan) veneer of sugar and chocolate, is a thick layer of juicy Christian religious expression. All Saints' Day on the old cale…

1
San Lanatus Fellowship Anniversary 48:50

1y ago48:50

48:50

We've really enjoyed doing this show together, and we've learned a lot. It's time to reflect on the foundation we've built. The natures of knowledge and belief are tricky philosophical concepts, and the motives any person might have for believing anything or claiming knowledge are as varied as anything else in human behaviour. We answer audience qu…

1
Story and Ceremony - an Interview with Cheryl Whiskeyjack 1:04:03

1y ago1:04:03

1:04:03

Canada's National Day for Truth and Reconciliation is right around the corner, and we've decided to interrupt our regular programming in favour of an interview with Cheryl Whiskeyjack from Bent Arrow Traditional Healing Society, and some important First Nations Stories. Canada's name is derived from an old word for village, making us the nation of …

1
Tomorrow is a Later Latter Day 53:19

1y ago53:19

53:19

If you think you know Mormonism, this one's for you. We examined the origins of the Latter Day Saints last month, and now we're taking a look at the men that led the Mormons in various divisions. There was a nonet of splinter groups that left the early Mormon Church before the assassination of Joseph Smith, but some of them shouldn't really count, …

1
Tomorrow is a Latter Day 56:13

1y ago56:13

56:13

Brigham Young gets a lot of credit as the "American Moses," but it's nothing compared to the work Joseph Smith did to earn that title. Moses led the people for many years, from place to place, but he never entered the Promised Land--like Joseph Smith. Joshua was the one who led the final trek into their new home--THAT'S Brigham's parallel. The Latt…

1
Lost and Found: Sacred Texts 1:08:10

1+ y ago1:08:10

1:08:10

Lost books include apocryphal literature from heretics, grifters, and entrapment-dodging translators, but there's also genuine works that were abridged or edited later, allowing the originals to disappear in the fog of disuse. Some books are lost because their religious traditions and communities have died out or were pushed underground, and other …

1
Staring Down the Canon 57:29

1+ y ago57:29

57:29

Staring Down the Canon might be intimidating for some, but now that we've explored several holy texts, we're ready to talk about the nature of scriptural authority and how texts are measured against one another within religious traditions. Books are a great way to preserve knowledge, testimony, and prophecy, but its imperative that readers remember…

1
Check Out These Noods 37:57

1+ y ago37:57

37:57

The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is one of the best books of religious satire released this century, and maybe it will hold that status for a while--only time will tell. After a serious look at the most revered books on the planet, it's time to lighten things up with the Pastafarians and their book that contains approximately as many cont…

1
Plates of Palmyra 45:51

1+ y ago45:51

45:51

The Book of Mormon has a better story than you might think, though not quite what you might have heard in Stone & Parker's musical of the same name. Rather than a tome of collected works, each the subject of contentious discussion in council, The Book of Mormon is an abridgement of a continuous historical record, with a couple appendices of origina…

1
The Next Guy is a Book 40:52

1+ y ago40:52

40:52

What is the Granth Sahib? What is the Adi Granth? The Guru Granth Sahib is the last and eternal Guru, an authoritative collection of sacred verses from not only the greatest Sikh leaders, but also from faithful Muslims and Hindus. Like other sacred texts, this collection has an interesting history, including a contested editorial process. Who are t…

1
Repeat After Me 50:20

1+ y ago50:20

50:20

What is the Quran? It is among the most published texts in the world, and among the most vilified in the global west. Who was really responsible for the book as we know it today, and how did imperial power play into its history? Why is it that so many interpretations of the text are considered authoritative, and what efforts were made to ensure the…

1
Imperial Influence on Scripture 1:08:31

1+ y ago1:08:31

1:08:31

The Christian New Testament is a tiny collection of letters, and a small handful of modestly interdependent testimonies of a personal Jesus from a small town in the unnamed northern province (now known as Galilee). The outliers are almost as valuable as the more orthodox materials. The Bible consists of four biographies, some of which show more int…

1
The Law of Displaced People 1:01:57

1+ y ago1:01:57

1:01:57

The Hebrew Bible is not the same thing as the Imperial Christian Old Testament (though it's very similar to the protestant version), but there are many different ways people draw value from these books. The Torah is not the same thing as the Old Testament: it is the 5 books classically attributed to Moses. For some who adhere to an Abrahamic faith,…

1
The Battlefield of Samsara 42:59

1+ y ago42:59

42:59

The Bhagavad Gita is one of the most religiously important pieces of Indian literature, a segment of the longest poem ever written: the Mahabharata has 1.8 million words. The origin of The Song of God is obscured a little by time, but it certainly predates the Christian scriptures, though its form was finalized after the Biblical Canon. Vishnu is s…

1
Eostre & the Bunny 1:00:17

1+ y ago1:00:17

1:00:17

Every spring, we celebrate the return of greenery and migratory birds, and the blooming of flowers; most animals celebrate by having lots of sex. Some of us get really religious about it. Easter is the celebration of fertility and renewed life, and every part of the secular observance reflects this. Several gods through a wide variety of traditions…

1
Breaking (Down) the Law - an Interview with Dr. Wes Thiessen 1:03:21

1+ y ago1:03:21

1:03:21

Dr. Wes Thiessen isn't just a great storyteller, he's a conflict resolution expert, and he's here to tell us about Sharia Law, its history, its real world function in Muslim communities, and why it shouldn't make anybody nervous. Islam is not monolithic, and neither is the study of law. The Golden Rule is extremely important in most legal cases, an…

1
Is He Caliphied? 40:38

1+ y ago40:38

40:38

What qualifies a man to lead the Ummah? Islam, like any religious tradition, is not monolithic. Let's explore the history of schisms and the personalities behind them in the early Islamic period. After Muhammad's death in 632 CE, there was a succession crisis; for some, it was a bigger crisis than for others. The first to be elected to take over le…

1
THOTs & Prayers 1:02:53

1+ y ago1:02:53

1:02:53

Sex and sexuality among believers isn't as monolithic as you might think, and of course there's the outlying "bad actors" to keep this spectrum broad. The Torah has some strict rules about who Jewish men should avoid, but isn't too quick to prescribe punishment for premarital sex. The Christian New Testament has some rules about minding your own bu…

1
Sainted Love 35:16

2y ago35:16

35:16

It's the season of love, but the man we know as St. Valentine is a bit of a mystery, lost to time, and almost certainly an amalgamation of two or more men. Valentinus was a big fan of romantic love, as the story goes, but there's more to be unraveled. Valentine's relics are scattered all over the planet, many of them in wax-sealed paper bags, which…

1
Medical/Miracle 1:02:42

2y ago1:02:42

1:02:42

Sometimes it's hard to know who to believe, sometimes it isn't: Do you believe the person who has studied the finest details of physical health and wellness for upwards of a decade, or do you trust your pastor who thinks that God couldn't possibly reveal those secrets to anybody willing to test such principles? Unfortunately, that's the dichotomy w…

1
Cash Blessings 1:05:38

2y ago1:05:38

1:05:38

There might be nothing more American than the emergence of Capitalist Jesus and the Prosperity Gospel. This episode explores the men behind the phenomenon, and the scriptural passages that are abused to defend it. Not all Pentecostal Christians fall into this trap, but these pastors have millions of followers around the world. Many of them are fund…

1
Literally Jesus - an Interview with Jack Hopewell 55:34

2y ago55:34

55:34

In this episode, we interview Jack Hopewell, who stars as Jesus Christ in the 50th Anniversary Tour of Jesus Christ Superstar. When Jesus Christ Superstar came out 50 years ago, it was controversial: the musical doesn’t depict the resurrection, it's sympathetic to Judas, it takes the position of predestination (Judas was required to betray Jesus). …

1
Rebranding the Holidays 38:09

2y ago38:09

38:09

You don't get many holidays that are more Christian than Christmas, right? The celebration of the birth of Jesus on December 25th is second only to Easter as far as Christian holidays go. But what if we told you that a lot of what we do is borrowed? Did you know that many of the Christmas traditions we know and love have roots in other cultures and…

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