Relationship status: married, partners in life and music since 2001. she/her. Just your traditional lesbian couple next-door. We try to keep it uplifting, entertaining, and educational around here for the LGBTQ community and progressive allies. For fans of positive spirituality, holistic health, and being the best you can be. Live Your Love Story ~ Siena and Toast
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We’re just your traditional lesbian couple next door, but API (Asian-American Pacific Islander), and originally from Hawaii (born & raised). We’re married, and have been partners in life and music since 2001. We try to keep it uplifting, entertaining, and educational around here for the LGBTQ community and progressive allies. Our podcast is for fans of positive spirituality, holistic health, and being the best you can be. Living Your Love Story means cultivating a love for your life as it is ...
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Energy Vampires are people who suck the life force outta you! In this episode, Siena - who is a Highly Sensitive empath type of person - shares what she’s found helpful in dealing with Energy Vampires. But first we chat about growing garlic in our home vegetable garden. More show notes at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/energyvampires Learn more …
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This episode was recorded when the world’s attention was on the 2024 Summer Olympics in Paris. So Toast might’ve gotten a little carried away or confused about some stories she related, so just to clarify, the stories of sportsmanship that we discuss did not happen at the 2024 Summer Games. But they did happen. And we’ve included links to more abou…
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Get Comfortable Being Uncomfortable
30:12
30:12
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30:12
This episode is all about getting comfortable being uncomfortable. The topics range from the Sony Walkman, to squirrels eating walnuts in the morning silence, to there being such a thing as very real dangers of too much convenience. https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/uncomfortable Links for stuff we mention: Bodyweight fitness programs by Mark Laure…
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Micro-Connections are small moments of connection with other people. Literally moments, not even minutes. Just a moment of holding the door open for someone, for instance. In this episode, we talk about why micro-connections are so important and powerful, for individuals – especially for people with a history of trauma– and for societies. The book …
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Relationship Quality Is Life
32:21
32:21
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32:21
This episode is a whole discussion about that saying of how the quality of your relationships is the quality of your life. Topics include the attraction of Hallmark movies, how early childhood trauma affects our ability to relate to others, EMDR therapy, and even relationships with the urban animals around your house, and more. https://sienaandtoas…
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Automatic Pet Feeder by PetKit
28:36
28:36
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28:36
Finally, an episode that’s about cats, by lesbians, or, we can say ‘by childless cat ladies.’ Anyway, more specifically, this episode is about an automatic pet feeder that’s impressed us so much, we wanted to tell you all about it. This is NOT a paid partnership . There are NO affiliate links. Like all our other episode, we just wanted to share, in…
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Three Simple Tips For A Better Night’s Sleep: Improved Self-Care for High-Stress Times
29:20
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29:20
No-brainer tips for a better night’s sleep. No-brainer as in nothing to do with meditating, or journaling or thinking. Just 3 super easy, science-based, CBD and cannabis-free things you can do to help improve your nighttime sleep. https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/3-no-brainer-sleep-tips https://instagram.com/sienaandtoast Learn more about your ad …
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Oregon Donkey Sanctuary, Plus a Neighborhood Raccoon
25:42
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25:42
In this episode, we attempt an imitation of a baby raccoon, but it kinda ends up sounding probably more like the fungus in The Last Of Us TV show. This episode also includes lots of enthusiastic but also very calm discussion about meeting donkeys for the first time, at Oregon Donkey Sanctuary. oregondonkeys.org It was our first meeting with donkeys…
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Icy Homemade Treats For Summer (Vegan)
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27:36
As we’re getting ready to release this episode, we’re also getting ready for a heatwave here in Portland, Oregon. And this brings to mind some of the icy homemade treats we’ve started enjoying this summer. In this episode, we share those recipes. It’s mouth-watering lemon, orange, and matcha flavors, but not all mashed up together. One at a time. Y…
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Chocolate & Coffee Tasting (for Introverts)
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26:30
Have you ever heard of the Cup Tasters Competition? It’s a coffee tasting contest and the US winner goes on to a World Coffee Competition. So we only know all this because we were given – as a gift – a virtual class in Chocolate & Coffee Tasting, taught by a winner of the US Cup Tasters Competition. In this episode, we tell you all about it. https:…
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In Praise of Craft Fairs & How To Deal With Awkward Vendor/Attendee Relations
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28:17
This episode is a big ol’ love letter to craft fairs, farmers markets, and other local, community-based gatherings. And, as a part of those, there can be a little awkwardness between the shop-keepers and the shoppers, so we get real and talk about that, too. Show notes are at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/craftfair2 https://instagram.com/sienaa…
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Where Do Lesbians Go For Fun? Craft Fairs (*not all lesbians)
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27:47
Where do lesbians go for fun? Good ol’ fashioned wholesome Craft Fairs! OK, not all lesbians, we’re not all like that. But in this episode, we share some tips, thoughts, and reflections after having attended our first craft fair of the spring & summer season. Show notes at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/craftfair Related links: craftywonderland.…
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Being Social For Introverts
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38:21
We are introverts. During the stay at home orders of COVID in 2020 and even in 2021 and 2022, we were fine staying at home with our cat. We were fine avoiding in-person social events even after that because inertia. But we also know it’s really not healthy to live like that. In this episode, we talk about the ironic effort it can sometimes take to …
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'80s Life: Music, MTV, Michael Jackson, The Sounds of Synth, Saxophones, and More
30:13
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30:13
This is the fifth and final episode in a series on daily life as we recall it during a brighter, more hot pink time in America’s history. In this episode, we riff off a list of ‘80s pop music trends, including MTV, the phenomenon of Michael Jackson, that ‘80s synthesizer sound, saxophone solos, big hair bands, novelty tunes, the rise of rap, and mo…
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’80s Life: Movies, Movie-Going, and Internalized Racism (Fatal Attraction & Sixteen Candles)
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36:03
This is the fourth in a series on daily life as we recall it during a brighter time in America’s history…or was it? In this episode, we talk about movies from The '80s. And shockingly, here in 2024, it’s a bit disturbing to look back and see the anti-Asian racism that was up on screen back then, and even more, that we – in Hawaii, populated mainly …
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‘80s Life: A Free-Range Playtime and The Birth of Video Games
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27:07
This is the third in a series on daily life as we recall it during a brighter, more hot pink time in America's history. If you were a kid in The ‘80s, what did you do for fun? We Gen Xers (roughly those born between 1965 and 1980) were probably the last American generation to experience a “free-range” childhood. That’s not what it was called back t…
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'80s Life: Fashion, Hair & Make-Up, Glamour Shots, and More
31:05
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31:05
This is the second episode in a series on daily life as we remember it during a brighter, more hot pink time in America’s history. We’re talking about The ‘80s. In this episode, we focus on ‘80s fashion, where everything was big. Big hair, big clothes. I mean really really big, loud, bright, and too much. We know this now. But we didn’t know it the…
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'80s Life: Rotary Phones, Cassettes, Boom Boxes
31:55
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31:55
Get in the Delorean because in this episode, we’re going Back To The ‘80s. This is the first in a series on daily life as we remember it during a brighter, more hot neon time in America’s history. In this episode, we recall the phenomenology and pace of life when your only options are rotary phones that belong to an entire household, music on vinyl…
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Astoria, Oregon: Flavel House Museum
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34:31
Astoria, Oregon, is the site of the first American-owned settlement on the Pacific coast of North America. In this episode, we share what we learned on our very first visit to Astoria: about Astoria’s origin story and our experience at its Flavel House Museum, which is somewhat haunted, because yes, I felt something, and so have other folks, appare…
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Unpopular Opinion: There Is a Wrong Way to Meditate
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29:41
In this episode, we share our experiences with meditation: learning about it, practicing it, not practicing it; using it, abusing it, misunderstanding it, and eventually getting to a place of actually understanding it. We discuss the meditation apps we’ve tried over the years, the things we’ve liked or not liked about various ones, the minimum effe…
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How To Get A Better Sleep: The Two Sleep Drives and The Perfect Bedtime
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28:11
This episode is based on a talk called “Working with Insomnia” by clinical psychologist Seth Gillihan. It covers tips for getting into a good groove when it comes to our sleep lives, that are all science-based and down-to-earth and doable. No crazy technology required. Show notes at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/sleepdrives Related episode: How…
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Intro to Energy Clearing
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36:18
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36:18
Have you ever felt sorta gross and grimy and a shower only helped so much, because the space you were in, itself, somehow felt heavy or gross? Well, if you had authority over that space, because it’s your home, or your room, or your office, you could do what’s called Space Clearing or Energy Clearing. In this episode, we talk about the mindset and …
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How to Not Be An A**hole To Your Partner When Things Don’t Go As Planned (or, How to Not Make Things Worse)
32:41
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32:41
We all make plans, and sometimes, those plans get completely up-ended by what actually ends up happening, because Life. When things like that pop up, what do you do? What should we do? How should we handle it? In this episode, we discuss the tough emotions and the harried thoughts that come with the very unexpected, and How To Not Be An A**hole To …
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Relationship Advice From a Lesbian Couple With 22 Years Together and Counting
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37:29
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37:29
We've been together as a couple for 22 years and counting. In this episode, we share about a time early on in our relationship when we were fighting a lot. And we also share the things that helped us to break out of that pattern, and to move towards growing in mutual understanding and peace. https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/relationship-advice-fro…
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In this episode, we share some thoughts and tactics that we found helpful when paring down and optimizing our personal libraries. For related episodes on decluttering, see: How to Declutter With Your Partner Part 1: Prepare With These Tips https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/declutter-tips How to Declutter With Your Partner Part 2: Get It Done With T…
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Even our friends who were born and raised in climates like Chicago and New York were gobsmacked by JUST HOW SLIPPERY the ground got during a recent ice storm here in Portland, Oregon. Personally, it was our first experience of any kind of ice storm. In this episode, we share the things we learned because of it, from appropriate footwear to electric…
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How to Declutter With Your Partner Part 2: Get It Done With These 5 Phases
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23:42
The previous episode was titled How to Declutter With Your Partner Part 1: Prepare With These Tips. In this episode, we share the 5 basic phases we went through while we were actually sorting through and dealing with all the stuff, the clutter! Hope these ideas are helpful for you. You can see all our show notes at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast…
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How to Declutter With Your Partner Part 1: Prepare With These Tips
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26:56
We’ve been decluttering over the winter break, and thought you might be, too. Here’s some discussion, anecdotes, and tips gleaned from our decluttering projects. We hope they come in handy or at least provide some entertainment for your decluttering efforts. See all the tips and show notes at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/declutter-tips https:/…
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Childhood Christmas in Hawaii ('70s and '80s), Tips for Managing Extra Ribbons, Cards, Treats, and Gifts
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39:22
In this episode we swap some memories of childhood Christmases in Hawaii during the '70s and '80s. Then we share ideas for managing extra ribbons, cards, treats, and gifts, and at the end, we include a song about a sometimes snow-capped mountain called Mauna Kea, on The Big Island of Hawaii. Show notes: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/1970s-1980s…
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Holiday Blues: Blue Can Be Beautiful Azure, Cobalt, Aquamarine
37:13
37:13
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37:13
We’re not mental health pros but we do have some thoughts and feelings about the holiday blues, some of which, we bet, you won’t find in a Google search. At least we haven’t seen it. If you want to jump ahead to the main topic, it starts at about 10 minutes in. Lots and lots more show notes at https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/holiday-blues https:/…
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Holiday Anxiety: How To Feel More Heavenly Peace
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36:48
In this episode, we discuss anxieties specific to the holidays. Anxieties about gift-giving, social events, the pressure to make dreams come true, and more. We also discuss some thoughts, practices, and attitudes that can make for less anxiety and a little more heavenly peace. We discuss specific Holiday Anxieties such as: Feeling like you’re behin…
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Do You Have Good Energy Etiquette?
28:57
28:57
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28:57
How’s your etiquette when it comes to energy? Do you have good energy etiquette? In this episode, we chat about what Energy Etiquette is, how it relates to good manners, and how it’s not the same as having good intentions. We discuss how Energy Etiquette overlaps with self-awareness, personal development, self-care, and more. And also part of the c…
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The Silence of The Lambs: Mirror and Magnifier of Homophobia in The '90s
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29:44
In this episode we discuss our reaction to watching The Silence of The Lambs, the movie from 1991, in 2023. The discussion is mostly about LGBTQ+ rights, and the evolution of social norms. We remember what it was like in The ’90s because we were there, and yes, things have indeed evolved. The main discussion starts at around 10 minutes in. See show…
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Thanksgiving: There's Triumph & Gratitude In 'Just' Being OK, Too
28:06
28:06
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28:06
Conventional wisdom in personal growth circles used to include the adage: “Don’t just survive, thrive!” As if ‘surviving’ was undesirable, and as if the opposite of surviving was thriving. But the actual opposite of surviving is not thriving, it’s dying, it’s croaking and breathing your last. In this episode, were inspired by the upcoming Thanksgiv…
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How To Get A Better Sleep
26:31
26:31
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26:31
The world’s gotten pretty tense and anxiety-ridden in recent years, and it isn’t going to let up anytime soon. This affects all of us, even in our personal lives. In this episode, we share the things that have helped us get a better sleep. A good sleep helps us cope, helps us be as strong and as supple as we can be, for ourselves and each other dur…
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Life’s Personal Growth Program for LGBTQ+ Folks Like Us
24:59
24:59
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24:59
In this episode, we share some reflections on how realizing we were gay also led to a richer, deeper, more meaningful life. The main topic starts at around (8:45). Being queer, non-binary, LGBTQ+ definitely has its hardships. But it can also come with priceless positive benefits. Benefits that you can’t buy with money, such as being genuinely more …
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How Did You First Know You Were Gay?
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33:55
We’re a couple of Asian Americans who grew up in Hawaii back in the ‘70s and ‘80s. In this episode, we talk about what it was like back then, to realize, slowly over time, that we were gay. The main topic discussion starts at around 10 minutes. (Before that, Siena’s on a mission to educate Toast about classic movies.) We’re a couple of Asian Americ…
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Beyond Pronouns: Don’t Call Her My Wife
26:06
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26:06
Just because a lesbian couple is married does not mean they really want you to call them “wives.” We can’t totally explain it, we just know it’s true. In this episode, we have fun musing over the reasons for our mutual distaste for the term ‘wife.’ We also share some personal stories about other terms you could use, along with a funny, awkward anec…
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The Problem with Pronouns: Misgendered Adventures
28:23
28:23
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28:23
The confusion with pronouns and misgendering has been around a long time. Like, for decades. It’s just that we as a society never talked about it, in public conversation. In this episode, we share some funny stories about being misgendered over the years, and also relate some advice and perspectives about how to broach the issue when meeting new pe…
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Is "Coming Out" Still a Thing?
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42:46
CORRECTION: Toast mistakenly associated “Prop 8” with Hawaii in this episode, but it was actually associated with California! More on this, and all the other episode details, on the blog: https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/is-coming-out-still-a-thing • Toast shares how she was raised as an Evangelical Christian & how she came out • Siena shares how …
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DIY Home Project: Painting The Garage
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31:21
This episode is some fun inspiration that’s also realistic and takes the pressure off, when it comes to home maintenance and improvement projects. Show notes https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/169-diy-painting-garage In this ep, you’ll hear us refer to a previous episode, and it’s this one: 136 Actually…Maybe You CAN Do It! (From Oct. 2022) https://…
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Top 10 Things We've Learned In Our 22-Year Lesbian Relationship, Pt. 3 (#s 2, 1, and a bonus)
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41:06
This ep is the 3rd and final part in a series called" The Top 10 Things We’ve Learned In Our 22-Year Lesbian Relationship." Here are the top-level points we cover in this ep. Scroll down even further for the link to the blog post where we put a bunch of additional show notes. 2. Learn about Attachment Theory and think in terms of your attachment st…
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Top 10 Things We’ve Learned In Our 22-Year Lesbian Relationship, Pt. 2 (#s 6, 5, 4, 3)
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40:43
This ep is part 2 in a series called" The Top 10 Things We’ve Learned In Our 22-Year Lesbian Relationship." Here are the top-level points we cover in this ep. Scroll down even further for the link to the blog post where we put a bunch of additional show notes. 6. Use a personality assessment tool 5. Sex. Do it. 4. Adventure & novelty are bonding 3.…
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Top 10 Things We’ve Learned In Our 22-Year Lesbian Relationship, Pt. 1 (#s 10, 9, 8, 7)
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36:23
As recording for this topic really got going, we realized The Content was getting a bit long. So we turned it into a series. This is part one. Before we get to the countdown, FYI, we mention another ep, and that ep is: #130, released on 9/6/2022, called "Back After A Year’s Hiatus: A Brief Intro to Who We Are & Why We Took a Year Off." With that sa…
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Skilled vs. Unskilled Acceptance of a Situation
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31:45
We’re often told to cultivate an attitude of acceptance in our lives, while simultaneously being told to push through and make a change. This episode, we delve deeper into exactly what “accepting something” means. Because it can mean more than one thing. Siena and Toast.com Find Siena and Toast on Instagram Love Cats? Go here Learn more about your …
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How To Be Assertive & Still Be Likable
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41:35
What would you do if a neighbor dumped trash in your recycling bin? Here’s what we did. A discussion about assertiveness when you’re female, Asian American, lesbian, and were born and raised in Hawaii. …can you be assertive and still be likable? Vanessa Van Edwards on Instagram @vvanedwards – instagram.com/vvanedwards instagram.com/sienaandtoast Bl…
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Anxiety About Social Connection
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34:37
Someone once observed how society was shifting its focus, as reflected in the names of popular magazines. First it was "Life" magazine. Then, "People." Then, "Us." And finally, "Self." This episode is a rambling discussion (and sometimes ranting) about various aspects of connection: our connection with groups, with each other, with ourselves. Siena…
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Facing Divorce When You Have Young Kids: a Flower Essence Journey
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28:31
You’re probably not aware of this, because it’s only through personal referrals, but Siena does private one-to-one consultations with people, using her background in holistic health, coaching, and healing, to help them navigate life challenges. Part of this work usually involves flower essences, a type of holistic energy medicine. But what does thi…
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161 Gluten-Free Bakeries in Portland, Oregon
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29:40
This episode is gluten-free. If you love tasting and talk about pastries and doughnuts and bakeries, join us as we share our gluten-free adventures in Portland, Oregon. We talk about Kyra’s Bake Shop, Gluten-Free Gem, New Cascadia Traditional, and Mikiko Mochi Donuts. Show Notes https://sienaandtoast.com/podcast/161-gluten-free-bakeries-in-portland…
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Back in the ‘90s, gratitude as a practice, as a journal, was this fresh new thing. In this episode, we talk about how and why in the intervening years the whole “gratitude” thing got to feel overdone. And then we talk about some of the unusual, awkward, semi-crazy ways we’ve refreshed it for ourselves this year. We reference another episode in this…
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