How You Come Across in Your Physical Delivery

Remarkability Institute with Bart Queen

Hey there. Bart queen here. Welcome to the remarkability Institute today. Guys, I want to take a very strong look at one area around communication in that physical delivery on how you come across, whether you're doing something virtually or doing something face to face. In this particular area. If I could write the script, if I could have my way, if I wave my magic wand, I'd make sure every 17 and 18 years old got this kind of information.

[00:02:14] Guys, I truly believe it would change how they do their college presentations, for lack of a better term. I truly believe it would change in that first job interview when someone says to them, why should I hire you over everybody else? And I, I believe it would begin to change how they're going to interact with their spouse or significant other whoever they're going to spend their lives with.

[00:02:38] One of my famous sayings, or one of the one of the things I like to repeat, one of the things that are important to me is this very simple concept that people buy what they see before they buy, what they hear, that people buy what they see before they buy what they hear. Now, if we. Embrace that concept.

[00:02:59] Then what we say and how we say it has to match. So for those of you who are parents out there, I want you to imagine that you're looking at one of your children, especially when they're younger, and you say, did you do that? And you can envision your son or your daughter putting their head down, kind of scuffing their feet and saying, no mom, no dad, I didn't do that.

[00:03:24] And you can look right at them. I know you are guilty. I know you did it. That is a great example of what you say and how you say it has to match. Maybe you've had the experience where you've met someone, and you went up to shake their hand, and you reached out, and you said, very nice to meet you, and they looked at the floor and said, yes, nice to meet you as well.

[00:03:52] That's another great example of what you say and how you say it has to match. The challenge here is when they don't match your credibility, and your trust factor goes down. The classic example I see, especially in the corporate world, if someone is in a small group meeting, they've done a presentation, they'll say, now are the, are there any questions?

[00:04:19] And when they say, are there any questions? They, too, they take two steps back if you think about it; I'm sure you've seen that situation play over and over and over again. Or maybe by chance, the presentation is over. An executive in the room raises their hand and asks a question, and the person who is about to answer it steps back two or three steps.

[00:04:43] I can promise you, even though they don't realize that they're stepping back, the visual that the audience sees says this is what it says to them. They're on the run. They don't believe what they've been telling us, and they're not confident in what they're telling us. This very simple concept of what you say and how you say it has to match is powerful.

[00:05:08] People buy what they see before they buy what they hear. Guys, I know you've been in a situation where someone's stepped up front, and you went, Hmm, boy, something about him or her. I'm not trusting. I do not like it. I'm concerned about whether we want to believe that people judge a book by its cover or whether we want to accept that concept.

[00:05:30] It's true. As soon as you and I walk into a room to do something, people will begin to look you up and look you down, and they get an assessment about you. They're already going to begin to say, wow, this looks like it's going to be good. I'm a little concerned. I trust them. No, I don't trust them.

[00:05:51] They're going to make all those perceptions before you ever start. So if you happen to be at your desk, you happen to be at your house, you're seated. You got a pen and paper in front of you. I want you to write that simple concept down to people by what they see before buying what they hear. I want to be able to build on that idea.

[00:06:14] Now, as we walked through this podcast today, guys, I'm going to be giving you a high-level overview of what I call the D delivery mechanics, the pieces that makeup everything that you need to think about when you're delivering a message. Now that's whether that's face to face or that's virtual. So realize if you're doing something virtually, they do not see some of these things, but these other mechanical pieces will come through in the way you carry yourself.

[00:06:43] They're going to hear this through your voice. If you're face to face, I want you to embrace this idea. Every single thing counts, which you don't think counts, counts, which you may not have worried about, may count to one of your listeners. Now. I'm not asking you to change who you are. I'm not asking you to change your choice of clothes.

[00:07:09] I am asking you to think through each one of those pieces and make sure that there isn't anything that you're doing that's a distraction. If there's something that's a distraction, I want you to think about getting rid of it. Just this week, I led a program around virtual communication, and one of the things that I highlighted in this virtual perspective is just for us guys, what is your shirt look like so I can incur and encourage you enough in those situations.

[00:07:43] Get rid of stripes and get rid of plaids. When it comes across on the video, sometimes it can seem like those things are moving, and then it can be a distraction for you. For you ladies, many times, you may wear a lot of Jangles or bracelets on your arm, and every time you took your hand up or take your hand down, you'll get that jingling sound.

[00:08:05] I'm not asking you guys again to change anything about what you do.

[00:08:09] I'm

[00:08:09] Bart Queen: asking, I'm asking you to build awareness around what may be a distraction. So let's take a couple of things in mind. Realize that people buy what they see before they buy what they hear. Big principle to think about. And number two, get rid of any of those distractions that may cause your listener, whether you're virtual or face to face, to not pay attention to what you're saying.

[00:08:35] Now, as we get into the area of the make of the mechanics, there are a couple of things, or let me give you a list of those things that I want us to build awareness around. Number one is your posture, whether you're standing or you're seated. Number two is physical movement. Whether you're standing or seated, whether you're face to face or you're virtual, it matters.

[00:09:00] I contact one of the probably the most important skill I want you to truly embrace and probably make a paradigm shift around from there, your physical gestures, what you're doing with your hands, your facial expressions, what you're doing with your face. You're smiling and realize that people can hear a smile on your face, which leads us to the last big component around your vocal variety.

[00:09:28] Now, vocal variety has five core components to it. There's the rate you speak fast, low; there's volume, loud, soft, there are your God-given pitch and tone. Just how your voice sounds, there's influxion, which is up, down in your voice, or maybe some of you might call that modulation, and then the power of the pause.

[00:09:56] This is your ability to give a sense of a sound bite. This is your ability to get rid of your ums and ahs. It may take us two different sessions to get through this, depending on how we break it apart. So if we only get through half of it,...