Talking Triggers with Tammy

Deconstructing Gaslighting™

There are a lot of words these days that are misunderstood. “Triggered” is one such word. It’s also a very important word, as it’s one of those words that can help us both recognize what’s happening to us, as well as help us communicate to others what is happening to us. So today, my guest and I are going to help bring clarity to the things surrounding the experience of being triggered and leave you with some helpful tips on how to recognize and deal with triggers.

Welcome to Deconstructing Gaslighting®, the podcast. I’m your host, Sarah Morales. This month, while summer is in full swing, I’m venturing away from specifically GASLIGHTING-themed topics, and instead bringing up topics that will hopefully help you fill your toolbelt. If you are looking for help specifically around GASLIGHTING issues, I encourage you to check out my website.

My guest today is Tammy Gustafson. Tammy is a trauma-informed Licensed Professional Counselor, coach, EMDR-certified clinician, and speaker. She is the founder of Betrayal Healing and is the host of the annual Betrayal Healing Conference.

Story Time: Sarah and Tammy talk about their own journey of healing and dealing with triggers, what they've seen as some of the most common struggles around triggers, and how we can "reduce or remove" triggers as we are healing.

Top Take-Aways: (5-10 min)

1. Reverse engineer – if you can identify when you have been triggered, work backwards. Ask your who/what/where/when. Who was around you? What did they say/do or NOT say/do? Where did it happen? When did it happen?
2. Ask: can I remove the thing that is triggering me? If not, can I minimize an aspect of it somehow – less time around a certain person/environment; boundaries around places/things; grocery shopping example.
3. Ask: is what I’m experiencing big feelings/activated or triggered? If it’s connected to a traumatic experience and we are in fight/flight/freeze/fawn, then we need to get to safety and get grounded/brain body connection back online. If activated, get curious - identify what feeling, what needs do I have? What values are being infringed upon, etc.
4. Try using the "How we feel" app to identify and track your feelings/triggers.

If you want to connect with or follow Tammy, you can go to her website, or follow her on Instagram or Facebook.

As I wrap up today, I wanted to let you know that if you want to understand more about the ways GASLIGHTING has shown up in your life, and robbed you of knowing yourself, loving yourself, and trusting yourself, check out my website. I have offerings that will help you break the hold self-GASLIGHTING has had over you and help you step into that Radical self-love.

I invite you to follow me on your preferred social media platform… I’m on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok.

And remember – you may have crashed and burned; been broke and hurt, but damn it, you’re a phoenix and you’re rising again. I think it’s time we fly.