#155: Coach Phil Jackson (14): Coaching with compassion.

Sport and the Growing Good

Why should coaches work with compassion? How can they do it?

1. Coach’s perspective on coaching clinics and professional development. “It’s a collaboration of thought and ideas.” “You have to go there with intention on what you want to learn.”

2. The importance of storytelling in coaching. “We are telling stories to ourselves all the time…So stories are part of our brain’s activity.”

3. Cataloguing stories that lend deep insights into key points you want to make.

4. Framing a team’s journey as a story: “We have a journey to make…What kind of story are we going to tell ourselves?”

5. Why is compassion relevant as a coach. “As a coach, you are called to drive people farther than they think they can go. To give more effort than they are capable of. And, in the process of doing that, they’re putting their lives and limbs in jeopardy a lot of times. They are playing with this controlled abandon…You’re trying to extend that level of energy to a point where they will be able to change the contest that they’re involved in…In the process, players overextend themselves, they get injured, they lose. You have to commiserate in loss and there is compassion.”

6. Shaquille O’Neal aspiring to be like Wilt: Being able to play heavy minutes. John Salley serving as a “go-between” for Shaq: “He wonders, do you think he’s doing a good job?”

7. Connections between Buddhism and Christianity: “In Buddhism, compassion is the response from the Buddha. In Christianity, love is the response from Jesus. The two come together.”

8. “We all suffer…Suffering is part of human nature.”

9. “It doesn’t have to be the big hug, but it has to be the understanding and the care. It can even be in the eyes.”

10. Compassion: “to suffer with.” It has an action element with it.

11. Compassion can “come from some basic things: a touch, a greeting, a ‘job well done…’”

12. Acknowledging challenges as a coach is important.

13. The critical nature of turning points. 1) newness; 2) injury; 3) not going well; 4) critical incident.

14. “Every coach who has done this for a while knows his way around a training room. Being there to support and commiserate.”

15. Elvin Hayes’ injury at a critical time.

16. Kobe Bryant ankle sprain during the finals: Handling it with compassion and firmness. “I’m so sorry that you’re not going to be able to do this.” Energy in coming back from the biggest disappointment of his career led to a big victory two days later.

17. Compassionomics book.

18. The details of compassion. Wording of questions. Touch. Physical presence.

19. The team supporting Scottie Pippen after a personal loss. Brought him to the middle of the room and putting a hand on him.

20. Johns Hopkins University study: Compassion reduces anxiety.

21. Showing a team “we’re in it together.” Example from a hostile environment. Sacrificing himself for the good of the team.

22. Virtuous cycles. Virtue compounds.

23. Coaches are “Riding the racehorse…The team is running the race. You can rank at the reins and yell… but the reality is, we’re in this together…You need to do it in a humanistic, compassionate way.”

24. Getting Michael Jordan to be patient with Steve Kerr, who’d been struggling to contend with John Stockton.

25. “Some of it has to be, ‘How compassionate can we be with ourselves?’”

26. Discipline. “Silly fines.” More serious issues. Knowing when there’s something bigger going on in a player’s life.

27. Re-integrating someone into the fold after a discipline or suspension: It starts in the center circle before practice.

28. Acknowledging outside events and discussing them as a team.