256 Lessons You Can Learn from Broken Friendships

Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary:

Relationship conflict can be difficult. Can good come from broken relationships? How do deal with mutual friends after a breakup? How do we get over the pain of friendships that end? And how does Jesus teach us to be a good friend? Join me with Jessica Van Roekel for Lessons You Can Learn from Broken Friendships.

Quotables from the episode:

• It could be safe to say we become God’s enemy when we harbor the sin of unforgiveness in our heart, which is why we must be careful not to point fingers at our ex-friend. Jesus tells us to take care of the log in our own eye before we point out someone’s splinter.
• It’s in this vulnerable moment when we hold our pain in all its throbbing mess where we discover the power of God to connect our pain with his suffering and see his glory in our lives through the healing he brings to our hurting heart.
• This truth remains: our reputation is in God’s hands, not man’s. God’s justice aligns with His character and attributes, and the beautiful things He says about us also apply to our friend. We don’t hold the market on being His most beloved child. God loves her as much as he loves us.
• When we demand God choose between the two of us, we lose sight of the overwhelming gift of reconciliation Jesus purchased for us when He died on the cross and rose three days later, conquering death and throwing open the doors to relationship with God the Father. Jesus’ death leveled the playing ground and made us equal in His sight.
• Friendship end stirs feelings of insecurity. Insecurity–can drive us to make our friends choose, to call us to question the security of other relationships, and to even behave in a way that hurts other relationships before we give them a chance to hurt us. We need our security grounded in who God says I am and his faithfulness as a friend.
• We may not have any say when a friend decides to discontinue the friendship, but we are responsible for our response. Regardless of how we are treated, we are to continue loving each other.
• Jesus identifies with all our struggles including friendship relationships.
• God can use our pain and healing to make us a friend like Jesus.
• Friendship pain can teach us what it truly means to forgive.

Scripture References:

• Matthew 5:43-44 (NIV) “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor i and hate your enemy.’ But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.”
• John 13:34-35 (NLT) reminds us “So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”
• 2 Thessalonians 2:16-17 (NIV) May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father, who loved us and by his grace gave us eternal encouragement and good hope, encourage your hearts and strengthen you in every good deed and word.

Recommended Resources:

• Reframing Rejection: How Looking Through a Different Lens Changes Everything By Jessica Van Roekel
• Sacred Scars: Resting in God’s Promise That Your Past Is Not Wasted by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
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• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Guest and Host:

Connect with Jessica Van Roekel:

Website / Instagram / Facebook

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

Jessica Van Roekel is a worship leader, speaker, and writer who believes that through Jesus, personal histories don’t need to define the present or determine the future. She inspires, encourages, and equips others to look at life through the lenses of hope, trust, and God’s transforming grace. Jessica lives in rural Iowa surrounded by wide open spaces which remind her of God’s expansive love. She loves fun earrings, good coffee, and connecting with others.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson